I've seen Heaven and I've met God
05.09.2005 - 7:52 am

Went to the beach yesterday. I got burnt. A little worse than last time. But it's all good.

Last night I woke up to Courtney watching Nightmare Before Christmas. It put me in a very weird mood. Not weird bad. Just weird. And I'm not sure "weird" is the right word here. I just hadn't seen that movie in a long time and let's just say I feel differently about it now than when I used to watch it as a kid. I just realized a bunch of stuff about it. And the whole time I was wondering why it didn't scare the crap out of me when I was a kid. I always loved that movie, but watching it now, why didn't the conehead guy ever scare me? He seems like something I'd be scared of. I don't fucking know. Anyway, that movie is fucking awesome, and I didn't relaize quite how awesome it was until seeing it last night. They did some cool shit with thta movie. Last night, for whatever reason, I liked the slow songs the best. They were so well done and made me wanna cry (not really).

Well after I went to bed last night, I had a weird dream about the end of the world. I just realized this is the second end-of-the-world dream I've had. Werid. I wonder what it means. I think my mind is opening up into a new realm, i swear to God. Well last night's end-of-the-world dream had a slightly different feeling. My first one, there were some bad shit that was going on before the end of the world actually happened, and as I was seeing it, it was like I was left behind and seeing the universe open up made my heart drop and I screamed "I BELIEVE" as loud as I could, thinking I could save the world. I remember being taken aback and I had tears behind my eyes because it was so HUGE.

Last night, it was a spiritual thing. I was in France, and people just started running. Well me and some other guy (it seemed like I was aquaintenced with him) ran down a way where no one was going. Then there was some reference as to the Second Coming and how it was going to be that day. Then me and this guy were just standing there and everything bleeped out of existance and there was nothing. But then this hole opened up and Jesus came out of it and picked us up and took us back with him, and we morphed into whatever we wanted to be the rest of eternity in heaven. Me and the guy I was with became birds and we were just flying all around heaven and I got to talk to God and for some reason I was on a cell phone talking to my dad, telling him I just shook hands with God (you know how dreams make sense while you're in them, and then look back later and think wtf?). But the cool part was, that I (and I imagine everyone there) was sooooooo happy. I don't think i've ever been that happy in "real" life. But in this dream... I was so happy, it's completely indescribable. Even when I woke up slightly, and I was still half asleep, during that time, everything made sense. God, Jesus, it all made sense. It all fit together. I didn't feel skeptical or questioning in any way. Everything fit. And I was still so happy. I remember being barely concious and all I could think of was sharing it to everyone. How this dream changed my life. It seemed so very huge at that moment. As I'm fully concious now, I don't see the significance quite as much... but I want to trust my subconcious because. . . well I have my reasons. So yeah. It was nuts. And to let you know, Heaven is an awesome place.

yesterday - tomorrow